The Power of Asking

Last week, while driving my daughters home from school, I asked one of them to walk me through the rhythm of her day. She shared about each transition: morning work, literacy, recess, who sits where…  Then she got to a small detail that made me smile: One student stands at the door before lunch and puts hand sanitizer on everyone’s hands.

It struck me as the kind of job a 4th grader might see as a coveted role: a small but meaningful leadership moment. 

So I asked the obvious question: “How did he get picked to do that every day?”

She paused for a second, shrugged, and said matter-of-factly: “He just asked.”

Before I could respond, her sister chimed in, raising one finger like she was sharing a universal principle: “The power of asking!”

When Did Asking Become So Hard?

Somewhere between fourth grade and adulthood, we forget that so much of life opens up because we simply ask.

We forget that:

• opportunities often go to the person who raised their hand,

• support appears when we say we need it,

• connection grows when we initiate it,

• clarity comes when we ask questions,

• and boundaries become real when we communicate them.

But asking carries risk.
What if the answer is no?
What if we’re misunderstood?
What if we look needy or unprepared?

Too often, we choose to wait.
We hope someone will see what we need, or what we dream about, or what we’re quietly hoping to lead.

Meanwhile, a 10-year-old just… asks.

No overthinking.
No self-doubt spiral.
No internal committee meeting.

Just curiosity → courage → action.

And life opens.

What Might Change if We Returned to the Simplicity of Asking?

What if the next thing you’re waiting for, an opportunity, a resource, a conversation, a new direction, is one question away?

What if the answers aren’t guaranteed, but the act of asking is itself a step toward agency, clarity, and growth?

What if asking is a spiritual practice, a leadership skill, and a way of honoring your own needs all at once?

What would you ask for if you believed asking was an act of courage, not inconvenience?